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Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
meeting the parents
An acquaintance once commented that he thought it bizarre that I should be as close to my friends' parents as I was to my friends. I, on the other hand, find it bizarre that he did not even know his friends' parents.
Maybe it was just where I grew up, but it was common that you should know your friends' parents and even feel comfortable calling them in a time of need. Sometimes, they were better to go to with your problems than your own parents because they gave you a more objective opinion on the situation. Especially when it comes to significant others. I am more anxious for my boyfriend to meet my friends' parents than some of my own family members. I know they are going to be more critical and they are also going to be the most fun. These are the people that have seen me grow up and know my embarrassing stories. They remember the things my parents forget and even know some things my parents don't!
My friends' parents are often a back up set of parents when mine are not around. When I left for college, the first thing I did when I made new friends was to meet their parents. These people opened their house to me as a home away from home (thanks Lee Bugs for sharing your Diddy). College can be scary at times and knowing you have a place to turn and adults to turn to can make it easier to deal with, even if you never need them.
I even looked to a friend's parents for a source of encouragement when mine were acting too cautiously like parents. My dad freaked when I decided to study abroad in Hungary. Not that Hungary is a scary place, but what if something happened? It would take over a day for him to get to me and that did not settle well with either of them. One afternoon while I was out swimming at a friend's house, I stopped by an ex-boyfriend's parents' house just to say hi. (You never break up with the parents!) They were so excited to hear that I was going to study abroad and made me promise to call them when I got back so they could take me to dinner so we could sit down and I could tell them everything about it. THAT was the kind of thing I needed to hear from my own mom and dad. I was scared as well about moving to a foreign country (where hardly anyone speaks any English) but I knew it was going to be a once in a lifetime chance I couldn't pass up. I needed someone to be excited for me. I don't blame my parents for acting the way they did, I understand, they are parents! They are supposed to worry. I was just grateful I had other adult influences to offer the encouragement I also needed.
Ultimately, I am usually really excited to meet the parents of anyone in my life. They are bound to be someone important. I also enjoy talking to people older than I am. When I was younger, I was that kid at the adult table sitting on my mom's lap or beside her because I found the adult conversation so much more entertaining than what was going on in the kid room/table. I have also felt at ease when meeting new people and in particular parents of the boyfriend. Seeing a boyfriend interact with his parents can tell you a lot about him that you might not know. However, for the first time in my life I am freaking out about meeting the parents of my current boyfriend. I was never worried about meeting them. It is my goal to make them like me and I know not to do, wear, or say anything that would ruin the first impression, so why now? Why am I freaking out about these parents. I blame the boy. He has done everything he can to make me worry that I am going to do something wrong. He means it all in playfulness but seriously, I am girl and girls worry!
I am meeting them tonight. I hope I don't screw this up!
Maybe it was just where I grew up, but it was common that you should know your friends' parents and even feel comfortable calling them in a time of need. Sometimes, they were better to go to with your problems than your own parents because they gave you a more objective opinion on the situation. Especially when it comes to significant others. I am more anxious for my boyfriend to meet my friends' parents than some of my own family members. I know they are going to be more critical and they are also going to be the most fun. These are the people that have seen me grow up and know my embarrassing stories. They remember the things my parents forget and even know some things my parents don't!
My friends' parents are often a back up set of parents when mine are not around. When I left for college, the first thing I did when I made new friends was to meet their parents. These people opened their house to me as a home away from home (thanks Lee Bugs for sharing your Diddy). College can be scary at times and knowing you have a place to turn and adults to turn to can make it easier to deal with, even if you never need them.
I even looked to a friend's parents for a source of encouragement when mine were acting too cautiously like parents. My dad freaked when I decided to study abroad in Hungary. Not that Hungary is a scary place, but what if something happened? It would take over a day for him to get to me and that did not settle well with either of them. One afternoon while I was out swimming at a friend's house, I stopped by an ex-boyfriend's parents' house just to say hi. (You never break up with the parents!) They were so excited to hear that I was going to study abroad and made me promise to call them when I got back so they could take me to dinner so we could sit down and I could tell them everything about it. THAT was the kind of thing I needed to hear from my own mom and dad. I was scared as well about moving to a foreign country (where hardly anyone speaks any English) but I knew it was going to be a once in a lifetime chance I couldn't pass up. I needed someone to be excited for me. I don't blame my parents for acting the way they did, I understand, they are parents! They are supposed to worry. I was just grateful I had other adult influences to offer the encouragement I also needed.
Ultimately, I am usually really excited to meet the parents of anyone in my life. They are bound to be someone important. I also enjoy talking to people older than I am. When I was younger, I was that kid at the adult table sitting on my mom's lap or beside her because I found the adult conversation so much more entertaining than what was going on in the kid room/table. I have also felt at ease when meeting new people and in particular parents of the boyfriend. Seeing a boyfriend interact with his parents can tell you a lot about him that you might not know. However, for the first time in my life I am freaking out about meeting the parents of my current boyfriend. I was never worried about meeting them. It is my goal to make them like me and I know not to do, wear, or say anything that would ruin the first impression, so why now? Why am I freaking out about these parents. I blame the boy. He has done everything he can to make me worry that I am going to do something wrong. He means it all in playfulness but seriously, I am girl and girls worry!
I am meeting them tonight. I hope I don't screw this up!
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Friday, July 23, 2010
atlas shrugged
I don't know why you should call my behavior rotten. I thought you would recognize it as an honest effort to practice what the whole world is preaching. Doesn't everyone believe that it is evil to be selfish? I was totally selfless in regard to the San Sebastian project. Isn't it evil to pursue a personal interest? I had no personal interest in it whatever. Isn't it evil to work for profit? I did not work for profit--I took a loss. Doesn't everyone agree that the purpose and justification of an industrial enterprise are not production, but the livelihood of its employees? The San Sebastian Mines were the most eminently successful venture in industrial history: they produced no copper, but they provided a livelihood for thousands of men who could not have achieved in a lifetime, the equivalent of what they got for one day's work, which they could not do. Isn't it generally agreed that an owner is a parasite and an exploiter, that it is the employees who do all the work and make the product possible? I did not exploit anyone. I did not burden the San Sebastian Mines with my useless presence; I left them in the hands of the men who count. I did not pass judgment on the value of the property. I turned it over to a mining specialist. He was not a very good specialist, but he needed the job very badly. Isn't it generally conceded that when you hire a man for a job, it is his need that counts, not his ability? Doesn't everyone believe that in order to get the goods, all you have to do is need them? I have carried out every moral precept of our age. I expected gratitude and a citation of honor. I do not understand why I am being damned.
-Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
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